The Horrible Toy

The centipede has made an appearance before, but  I thought it deserved an entry of its own.  When I first saw this thing in Pet Smart my first reaction was, and I quote, “ew.”

I mean, seriously, ew.


Despite that reaction I paid good money for it, and brought it home, where it was well received.  Why would I bring such an ugly thing into my house?

THIS is why.

I’ve known a dog who would happily gnaw on the same stuffed toy for YEARS without putting a single hole in it.  That dog was not Hershey.   Hershey is a Destroyer.  When she was younger she ripped up numerous toys, dog beds, cat beds,  one throw pillow, one, maybe two regular pillows and at least one tennis ball that I remember.

I soon learned to buy rope toys, as they were the only ones she couldn’t destroy in short order and to stop buying dog beds.  Miraculously, despite the fact that I’ve caught her eating the outer covers of baseballs, she has never once attempted to eat my leather sofas; lick excessively, yes, but that’s another story.

So, after a year or two I thought Hershey’s soft goods dismembering, stuffing plucking days were behind her.  Recently though, they have come back and wreaked havoc on my bedspreads, three down within the last two months.

Clearly, my dog was telling me that she desperately needed something she could obliterate, and if I wasn’t going to provide her with something, she would find her own.

Enter the horrible centipede toy.  Despite its prodigious length ( 3 inches shy of 4 feet!) it was only $13, with plenty of stuffing to pluck, legs to pull off, and four squeakers to extract and disable.  When I presented it her, she got to work on all those endeavors in short order.

One leg down, 99 to go…

That’s not to say the others haven’t had a go at it:




Marsha in particular has been instrumental in delegging the unfortunate arthropod, something I know because of the bizarre orange poops that started showing up in the backyard.

Everyone is fond of it and it has become the go to, all purpose toy.  It’s great for tug of war, ripping, casual licking, and determined destruction.  It’s even fun for the human of the house as it can be used create humiliating pictures of the dogs.

This picture makes me laugh and feel guilty at the same time…

We’ve had the centipede for over a month now, and it’s showing signs of wear.  All of its legs are gone, and one of its pinchers, so are its squeakers, and it has a number of holes where it is leaking stuffing.  Really it looks more like something I’d use a pooper scooper on than a giant, plush invertebrate. This was all part of the plan.

img_7294 The dogs are having fun with it, it has plenty of play time and a lot of stuffing left, as does my last remaining comforter.  The best $13 on a horrible toy I’ve ever spent.

The Horrible Toy

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